I get headaches. Bad headaches. I just woke up 30 minutes ago feeling like someone hit me in the back of the head with a baseball bat. The nausea, disorientation and extreme pain always makes me feel like I’m teetering right on the edge of my limits. As if just a little more and I’m gonna lose it, implode, or curl in on myself and mentally snap. It gets so bad I can’t wrap myself around it. I do. Obviously. I haven’t imploded yet. And I’ve had these headaches so many times in the last five years that apparently I’m not going to die or go mad from them, but each time it feels like maybe this one is the one.
Yes, I’ve seen doctors about my headaches. I’ve been to many different kinds of doctors about my headaches. But not a headache specialist. I saw something on television the other morning about dealing with migraines and sometimes having to go through not only many doctors, but sometimes having to go through many headache specialists before a person can find their own individual solution.. am I at the end of a long run-on? I’m typing and looking away from the brightness of the screen (with one eye closed) so who knows when I’m still not fully awake… I’ve lost my train of thought.
Anyway… I need to find a specialist here in Huntsville. For whatever reason these headaches started roughly five years ago. At first I had them almost daily. Now, maybe a few times a month. The pain is absolutely unbearable, completely in control if I let it. But whatever the reason.. I can’t give in to them now. I have Aegwyn to take care of and I don’t have time to lay in bed grasping at sanity.